US Plans To Transport Al 9.7 Million Haitians To France - Obama Tells French They're Your Fucking Problem Now

OBAMA ORDERS LIBERTY SHIPS CALLED UP FROM MOTHBALL FLEET. HIS PLAN - TO EVACUATE HAITI AND TRANSPORT ALL 9.7 MILLION RESIDENTS OF THAT COUNTRY TO FRANCE! YOU SEE, FRANCE UNDER COLONIAL RULE RAPED AND PILLAGED HAITI OF ALL OF ITS' NATURAL RESOURCES THEN TOSSED IT ASIDE ONCE IT DRAINED EVRY DROP OF JUICE FROM THAT FRUIT.

ONCE ENSCONCED IN FRANCE, OBAMA WILL FORCE THE FRENCH TO SEND HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF FROGS [SLANG TERM FOR THE FRENCH] TO REPLANT THE HAITIAN PART OF HISPANOLA IN ORDER TO BRING BACK THE LUSH FORESTS, FRUIT TREES AND VEGETATION THAT ONCE COVER THAT PART OF THE ISLAND.

OBAMA HAS ALSO ORDERED THE UN TO FUND THE CONSTRUCTION OF MODERN HOUSING WITH ALL MODERN CONVENIENCES. THE CONSTRUCTION OF 18 MILLION HOUSING UNITS IS EXPECTED TO TAKE 40 YEARS COMPLETE AND WILL BE DONE BY THE CHINESE CONSTRUCTION CONGLOMERATE OF WANG, WO AND LEE.

ONCE THE HAITIAN PART OF THE ISLAND HAS BEEN RESTORED, THE HAITIANS WILL THEN BE ALLOWED TO RETURN TO LIVE IN THEIR NEW CONDOS COURTESY OF THE FRENCH. THERE WILL BE FANCY SUPERMARKETS IN EVERY NEIGHBORHOOD. FOR TRANSPORTATION, SUZUKI MOTORWORKS OF JAPAN HAS AGREED TO SUPPLY MOTORCYCLES AT WHOLESALE PRICES TO THE RETURNING HAITIANS. A TEMPORARY INCONVENIENCE FOR HAITIANS NOW, BUT, WITH LONG TERM BENEFITS! WAY TO GO OBAMA! GOOD JOB FRANCE!