I'll Have Beefalo

PETA WOULD HAVE YOU BELIEVE THAT THE TURKEY FARMING INDUSTRY IS SO CRUEL AND INHUMANE THAT EVERYONE SHOULD BE HAVING TOFU TURKEY THIS THANKSGIVING! ME, I'LL HAVE SOME BEEFALO! A CROSS BETWEEN A BISON AND A COW THAT I RAISE ON MY RANCH HERE. I JUST SLAUGHTER ONE, AND I HAVE MEAT ALL THROUGH THE END OF NEXT SUMMER! I'LL THROW IN A COUPLE OF GAME HENS I TOOK OUT IN THE FIELDS OVER THE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS, TOSS IN SOME ICE COLD BEERS AND I'M ALL SET FOR THANKSGIVING. THIS YEAR, THANKSGIVING COINCIDES WITH THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE ASSASSINATION OF JFK BACK IN 1963. BOY, WHAT A CONSPIRACY AND COVER-UP THAT WAS!
IN THE MEANTIME, WE HAVE A LOT TO BE GRATEFUL FOR, THAT'S FOR DANG SURE!