Ted Cruz, Where's You're Birth Certificate You Fucking Canadian!?

He's A Goddamn Canadian! He Was Born In Canada! A Canuck!

He Has An Answer For Everything! More Guns!

Cruz's Dad Fought For Castro! No Shit! He Then "Regretted It"

Orly, Are You Going To Demand To See Ted's Canadian Birth Certificate Too?

Hey Ted! Got Yours Handy!

Everytime I Get Into Toronto, I Load Up On Cuban Cigars! I Bet Ted Has A Couple Of Boxes Shipped To Him Courtesy Of el Padre, Fidel Every Couple Of Months!

Joe McCarthy And Ted Cruz Cut FromThe Same Cloth

Cruz Will One Day Put The Nation Into Serious Crisis, Mark My Words, That Is My Prediction

Cruz Loves  Jesse Helms That Bigoted Old Rednreck Conservative Phoney

Yep, He's An Evangelical Southern Baptist!

The Tea Party, Gun Toting Libertarian Anti Government Wing Of The Republican Party Will Want Your Vote In The Next Major Election Cycle! Watch Out!

WELL IT'S GOING ON 11 HOURS SINCE CRUZ BEGAN HIS SPEEL ON THE FLOOR OF THE SENATE. EITHER HE'S WEARING DEPENDS OR HAS A CATHETER DRAINING INTO A COLLECTION BAG TIED TO HIS LOWER LEG. I KNOW I CAN'T GO MORE THAT 5+ HOURS WITHOUT TAKING A LEAK. I HAVE THE LIVE FEED OF HIM ON C-SPAN 2 AND AM WATCHING HIM LIVE AS I WRITE THIS. WHAT A LINE OF BULL DICKEY THIS TEXAS PRICK HAS. IT'S PATHETIC. HE THINKS HE'S REALLY SOMETHING! HE'S A FUCKING ASSHOLE!

CRUZ'S CLAIM TO FAME, IS, HE WENT TO IVY LEAGUE SCHOOLS, WAS A GOVERNMENT ATTORNEY, CLERKED FOR THE CHIEF JUSTICE OF THE SUPREME COURT AND JOINED THE BUSH-CHENEY ADMINISTRATION AS A "CONSULTANT". HE'S ALSO ARGUED NINE CASES IN FRONT OF THE US SUPREME COURT. NOW AS JR. SENATOR FROM TEXAS, HE HAS TASTED THE POWER THAT COMES FROM BEING US SENATOR FROM THE 2ND MOST POPULOUS STATE IN AMERICA[TX=26+MILLION PEOPLE!], HE CAN ALMOST, TASTE THE HALLS OF POWER IN THE WHITE HOUSE! OH, YES! HE AND RAND PAUL, THEY DO..., HAVE A SPECIAL VISION FOR AMERICA..., SO STAY TUNED!

HEY CRUZ! JUST BE SURE YOU HAVE YOUR BIRTH CERTIFICATE READY, YOU FUCKING CANADIAN!